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  • Entrepreneurs

    Help spending money!!!!

    Hi all ,

    apologies for the dramatic subject line but just wanted to draw some attention to this post in the hope that others can chip in with there thoughts.

    my financial past is somewhat chequered. I am now aged 31 and at present in a reasonably comfortable financial position although it hasn’t always been so . Around 6-7 years ago I was doing the classic mistake of spending more than I earned and very much living for today . It’s very cliched but true to say that reading Rich Dad changed my financial path for the better . I completely changed my ethos and began to work every hour god sent and save every penny I earned .

    Fast forward to today and I have 3 investment property’s which give a healthy return via differing strategies and I continue to work full time . I now have what I personally view as a problem in that I now feel a great sense of guilt around spending money .

    From an investors stand point this sounds great however I can’t help but feel an endless life of financial sacrifice will not make for a very fun  one. I wondered if any of you may have experienced a similar feeling ? If so how do you manage it ?

    I have a good chunk of equity tied up in the property’s , I am considering taking some out for enjoyment purposes as opposed to ploughing on ahead with another investment .

    I appreciate I am relatively young still and a good financial position is built over many years and I am also aware that it can very quickly change if property’s are leveraged too high so I am not talking reckless here but wondered what others feelings and experiences on this are ?

    thanks in advance



    Delaying  gratification can be conscious decision and should be a joy not a guilt

    Its not a sacrifice but a relief

    Fortunately It comes naturally to me as this is the way I was brought up so I have my parents to thank

    Its a state of mind so train the mind if it doesn't come naturally

    Look at your friends and family . If they suffer from `Affluenza` then be careful ( read the book )

    They may drag you along with them with the old peer pressure thing

    A spender wants you to spend as well to make themselves feel better

    Read `Emotional Vampires` - They drain you dry - Avoid them

    We have fake news and we also have fake joy - Facebook is littered with fake joy

    It hurts people when you tackle this subject if they are materialists -  so go careful

    If in doubt about the fakeness of material things  - my go to example  is fireplaces

    The victorians put them then in the 1950`s people ripped them out saying they are ugly

    Then now we rip out the ugly 1950 stuff and spend a 1000 putting  victorian fieplaces in again

    Its crazy how the mind plays these fake tricks with you and all humans

    Your primary needs are just warmth, food, drink and love .

    Happiness cannot be bought except on a temporary superficial basis

    But the counter to temporary  is a downer to compensate .

    Christmas then New year blues for example

    Look at the green valley with the trees and the flowers in sunshine. Its free .

    No one ever tires of this view . No one.


    Jonathan Clarke. http://www.buytoletmk.com

    Hi Chris and thank you for posing such an interesting question - no need to apologise about an eye-ball grabbing title! Smile

    It's a curly one.

    First of all, congratulations on what you have achieved so far.  That is something to reflect on and be grateful for.

    Secondly, what were your original goals for investing in property and are you close to them?

    At times like this, there is no need to make a rush decision.  Take time to reflect on your current position, where you would like to be, and what steps you might take to get there.

    It might be worth going on some kind of course to improve your relationship with money.  

    Forbes have this article which may also assist - 15 ways to improve your relationship with money

    These include:

    • Pay Attention To It. When your loved one comes into the room, you acknowledge him or her. ...
    • Make Time For It. ...
    • Prioritize It. ...
    • Celebrate The Good. ...
    • Forgive The Bad. ...
    • Keep A Sense of Humor. ...
    • Respect It. ...
    • Don't Manipulate It or Try Power Plays.

    I would add that developing a mentality of abundance should help assist you in moving forwards.  Money is not there to be held on to, it is there to be shared around.  There are no pockets in shrouds. 

    Perhaps, when thinking about buying another property, put a different intent behind it, such as "How can I create a property that will enrich someone else's life?".  You could consider a bungalow for a disabled person for instance.

    For what it is worth, Nick and I have changed our outlook on money. 

    We now focus on creating memories and wonderful moments more than acquiring material things.  We travel all over the UK in our motorhome with our three cats visiting wonderful places that enrich our lives.  Earlier this month, we stayed in the Sandringham Estate in Norfolk for £18.00 per night.  It is a truly beautiful place and we were literally staying in the Queen's back garden!  So, you don't have to spend a lot to have a fantastic life if you focus on creating memories, not a mountain of material items that will clutter up your home and credit cards.

    When you think of your money, think of it as a force for good - for you, your family, your friends, and any charitable causes you wish to support.  Money really only bites back where excessive greed or mis-management is involved, so don't over-leverage and keep your feet firmly on the ground and you should be fine.

    I hope those preliminary thoughts assist?

    See this thread from the archive - The Problem with Delayed Gratification


    Hi Chris.

    Firstly well done for putting your financial future ahead of the easy option of spend, spend, spend. That show maturity.

    I am a little older than you and always had the attitude to sacrifice a little now and have a comfortable life later for myself and family.

    That's worked well for me and I do not regret it. I now am free of the 9 to 5 and travel about 3 months a year. I also dabble in property as I enjoy renovating.

    My message is simply invest in your future and that of your family as your in a good position. Take some of the 'profit' to have fun too but set yourself a budget for the things you really want to do and have. Its all about balance.

    I hope that helps


    Well done OP for getting yourself back on track. Seems like you've achieved a LOT since you started afresh.

    Why not do what Richard Branson does (amongst many other things) and buy assets that you can use yourself, like Vanessas motorhome idea, but can at the very least pay its way by say renting it out to others. RB does this with his islands and lives there himself as I'm sure you already know.

    Ok, so we're maybe not all going to buy an island. What are your other interests and can you enjoy but invest at the same time?

    I bought a car I'd been after for years last Xmas (2 days before) - bargain price, couldn't resist. I've done nothing with it except store it properly and I will look to possibly sell it for 3 times the value in spring if I can get the right price for it.

    If you like buying and selling things it can be the perfect financial antidote to your desires.


    I wouldnt say that I feel guilty spending money...  I think what I now do is understand more what that money could earn me, which means spending large sums on silly items seems very silly, when I know how much that lump of cash could earn me instead.